Sunday, July 29, 2012

Mountain Air Manifesto

Greetings and salutations!

Long time no talk. I apologize but you're probably used to me taking my sweet time in between entries...I like to build anticipation to manipulate your interest in my writing.

And here we are.

I am happy to report to you that I am in fact not writing to you from the majestic and scenic borough of Queens but I am writing to you from this dump of a town with views that don't even come close to rivaling the Triborough Bridge and Queensborough Bridge. (side note: sarcasm is my strongest suit.)

I am still sexless though. (another side note: consistency is overrated.)

In all seriousness though, Aspen, Colorado may be the most beautiful place I have ever been to. I find myself surrounded by the most beautiful mountains and breathing the freshest air that has reached my lungs in years.

I am not used to magical lands such as these. So much so that my first night here my head hurt so badly and my body swelled up like the Michelin Man. I was told that it was the altitude but I think my body was in overdrive trying to figure out where the smell of urine and sweaty homeless people went. But I woke up the next day feeling just fine, so I think I will survive just fine...fear not.

I could get used to big mountains, fresh air and quaint towns. There is something strangely humanizing about places like these. Places where nature is the star of the show and towns are built to allow us to look up and marvel at the unexplainable beauty that was created for us and not created by us.

I fancy myself a creator and I spend so much of my time figuring out how to be an effective and successful creator that I don't really stop to smell the roses...ever. Living in New York as a struggling artist doesn't really afford you much time or opportunity to stop and take a moment to just appreciate what is and forget about the worry of what will or could be.

But this morning as I write to you, I am discovering how important it is to come up for air every now and again. Even if the air is reallllly thin.

I have been really beat down by the hustle and bustle of life lately...feeling over worked, underpaid and finding myself forgetting all the reasons as to why I am in New York. Lately living in New York means waiting tables and hoping I can afford rent, student loans and 3 cups of coffee a day. And this may be a surprise...but that's actually not why I moved here three years ago. But as I sit here amongst mountains, good coffee and a stranger's dog who is resting his sweet head on my foot I can't help but feel glad that I have worked hard and been beat down a bit and that I can take a moment to go to a place like this, spend time with someone I love truly and sit in a coffee shop and just be glad to be alive and realize just how lucky of a girl I really am.

I have heard many people say that one of the best parts of living in New York is leaving New York and today I know that to be true in my life.

I love being a New Yorker. I love that the city holds some of my hardest and darkest times and I love that it also holds some of my most beautiful and brightest moments. I love the sense of pride I feel when I tell people where I live and that I am there ultimately pursuing my dreams and my art and that I don't just survive in New York but I thrive there.

But to thrive sometimes you need to take a step back and breath so when you jump back in you return with focus and purpose but more importantly you return knowing that life isn't about the future, it's about the now and the now can be simple and beautiful no matter where you are, no matter how confused by life you may be, no matter how tired you may find yourself.

Right now I am happy and in the mountains spending time with one of my best friends. Right now I am content.

We should always find the fresh air and mountains. And if there aren't any mountains and there is a short supply of fresh air, then we may need to get creative. But I bet there will always be smiles, laughter, sunshine and puppies just waiting to brighten our day if we take time to notice.

Maybe...more than likely.


  1. I love you so much. Your post made me cry a little. I send you my love from Chile. I miss New York, but you are right about the "now" and be content with what we are holding in the present moment.

    I admire you for all your doings, for all your struggles and for your great strength.

    Love & Light.